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maniacal_tentacle_monster commented at 2011-01-24 11:05:49 » #593860
Tifa-Wannabe vs Stormtrooper.
ROUND 1...
FIGHT!!!
11 Points
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Tifa-Wannabe vs Stormtrooper.
ROUND 1...
FIGHT!!!
11 Points
Flag
Anonymous commented at 2011-02-11 06:55:37 » #616190
Tiffa-Wannabe launches forward. The Stormtrooper rises his blaster, shoots... and misses as usually stormies do. Tiffa-Wannabe lands a powerfull kick on Stormie's head cracking the helmet and sending it spinning into the air. Finally, with full visibility regained, Stormie shoots again another blaster-bolt hitting his opponent square in the chest making it his first kill in his career.
The crowd cheers!
ROUND 2...
FIGHT!!!
Suddenly, Tifa-Wannabe's friends assault the poor Stormie attempting to knock him down. But alas, nothing is lost yet, Stormie manages to dive and evade their attacks, runs for his helmet and puts it back on his head. He quickly calls for reinforcement. The 501st legion is sent to the fighting scene quickly taking out the rest of Tifa-Wannabe's team.
To ensure this incident is not repeated, Vader instructs Grand Moff Tarkin to use his favourite weapon: Fear, that will keep the enemies in line. But learning from his mistakes, this time Tarkin blasts the planet infested with Tifa-Wannabe's teammates and fans instead of an allegedly neutral planet.
Result of the fight: Stormie and reinforcements 1 - Tiffa-Wannabe's team 0.
59 Points
Flag
Tiffa-Wannabe launches forward. The Stormtrooper rises his blaster, shoots... and misses as usually stormies do. Tiffa-Wannabe lands a powerfull kick on Stormie's head cracking the helmet and sending it spinning into the air. Finally, with full visibility regained, Stormie shoots again another blaster-bolt hitting his opponent square in the chest making it his first kill in his career.
The crowd cheers!
ROUND 2...
FIGHT!!!
Suddenly, Tifa-Wannabe's friends assault the poor Stormie attempting to knock him down. But alas, nothing is lost yet, Stormie manages to dive and evade their attacks, runs for his helmet and puts it back on his head. He quickly calls for reinforcement. The 501st legion is sent to the fighting scene quickly taking out the rest of Tifa-Wannabe's team.
To ensure this incident is not repeated, Vader instructs Grand Moff Tarkin to use his favourite weapon: Fear, that will keep the enemies in line. But learning from his mistakes, this time Tarkin blasts the planet infested with Tifa-Wannabe's teammates and fans instead of an allegedly neutral planet.
Result of the fight: Stormie and reinforcements 1 - Tiffa-Wannabe's team 0.
59 Points
Flag
Anonymous commented at 2011-04-04 09:27:46 » #681146
Keep in mind that the Ewoks had a significant numerical advantage, strength comperable to that of a wookiee, small targets capable of easily hiding in the dense underbrush. Had a great deal of traps set up and were still getting their asses kicked by the Stormtroopers until Chewie stole one of their walkers, and even then the Empire would have won if Han hadn't tricked them into opening their doors.
They weren't beaten by the Ewoks, the Ewoks simply provided a distraction that the Rebels, or more speficially Han, exploited.
As for the hallway battles, note that on the first death star they WANTED luke, han, leia etc to escape to track them to their base, this is even stated on screen, multiple times.
On cloud city we see that the Stormtroopers are again, missing on purpose as this time they disabled the hyperdrive on board the falcon in order to pick them all up at once, including luke.
so no, Stormtroopers are NOT bad shots, contrary to popular misconception.
4 Points
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Keep in mind that the Ewoks had a significant numerical advantage, strength comperable to that of a wookiee, small targets capable of easily hiding in the dense underbrush. Had a great deal of traps set up and were still getting their asses kicked by the Stormtroopers until Chewie stole one of their walkers, and even then the Empire would have won if Han hadn't tricked them into opening their doors.
They weren't beaten by the Ewoks, the Ewoks simply provided a distraction that the Rebels, or more speficially Han, exploited.
As for the hallway battles, note that on the first death star they WANTED luke, han, leia etc to escape to track them to their base, this is even stated on screen, multiple times.
On cloud city we see that the Stormtroopers are again, missing on purpose as this time they disabled the hyperdrive on board the falcon in order to pick them all up at once, including luke.
so no, Stormtroopers are NOT bad shots, contrary to popular misconception.
4 Points
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Anonymous commented at 2011-04-05 04:01:38 » #682249
Jeez, some people can't understand a joke and a funny comment even if it is obvious!
The standard-issue Stormtrooper blaster is known for its poor design that lead to diminished accuracy even in the hands of the best marksmen. Their helmets also hindered them in their aim, and the line "I can't see a thing in this helmet" is even present in the movie to explain this. This two things combined led to a lack of accuracy. Note: when the blasters were used alone, without helmets, the wielders had better aim (coincidentaly, those wielders were main protagonists, not tertiary characters.)
The fact that it is stated on screen that the main characters were let go unharmed is just a narrative device to explain that major characters in a story cannot be killed in random skirmishes. Because they drive the plot, they can only be killed in climatic battles after they have fullfiled their role.
Using this narrative element of tertiary characters having bad aim, explained with faulty and innacurate gear (or even with bad training in other stories), the main protagonists' life can be ensured until they achieve their goals. This is present in any kind of stories, novels, movies, etc, not just in Star Wars.
In the above comment of the fight with Tifa-Wannabe the similar narrative device was used to create a funny short story. Please note that even the helmet's visual system was incorporated to clear the fact that they are not bad, just have bad equipment for narrative purposes.
I'm sorry that some people misunderstood the little fight-scene as an attack on stormies. It was written as a humorous comment to entertain others, make them laugh and provide them some funny seconds to brighten their day a little bit.
41 Points
Flag
Jeez, some people can't understand a joke and a funny comment even if it is obvious!
The standard-issue Stormtrooper blaster is known for its poor design that lead to diminished accuracy even in the hands of the best marksmen. Their helmets also hindered them in their aim, and the line "I can't see a thing in this helmet" is even present in the movie to explain this. This two things combined led to a lack of accuracy. Note: when the blasters were used alone, without helmets, the wielders had better aim (coincidentaly, those wielders were main protagonists, not tertiary characters.)
The fact that it is stated on screen that the main characters were let go unharmed is just a narrative device to explain that major characters in a story cannot be killed in random skirmishes. Because they drive the plot, they can only be killed in climatic battles after they have fullfiled their role.
Using this narrative element of tertiary characters having bad aim, explained with faulty and innacurate gear (or even with bad training in other stories), the main protagonists' life can be ensured until they achieve their goals. This is present in any kind of stories, novels, movies, etc, not just in Star Wars.
In the above comment of the fight with Tifa-Wannabe the similar narrative device was used to create a funny short story. Please note that even the helmet's visual system was incorporated to clear the fact that they are not bad, just have bad equipment for narrative purposes.
I'm sorry that some people misunderstood the little fight-scene as an attack on stormies. It was written as a humorous comment to entertain others, make them laugh and provide them some funny seconds to brighten their day a little bit.
41 Points
Flag
Mactíre commented at 2011-05-10 19:14:16 » #728450
"Jeez, some people can't understand a joke and a funny comment even if it is obvious!...
etc etc etc..."
So basically what you are saying is it works by magic?*
*Did not read wall of text. Simply imagined the response I'd liek to hear instead.
1 Points
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"Jeez, some people can't understand a joke and a funny comment even if it is obvious!...
etc etc etc..."
So basically what you are saying is it works by magic?*
*Did not read wall of text. Simply imagined the response I'd liek to hear instead.
1 Points
Flag
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